36 weeks.

Holy schmoly... by the end of this week we'll be full term. 

Are you understanding the words coming out of my mouth?? 

5 more days and we will be full. term. 

My God... where has the time flown??

And so I have decided to mark this final week before it becomes a waiting game for Ty's arrival with a little questionaire of many of the questions that I received throughout this pregnancy. Not really because you're interested but because it may be fun to look back on someday... :)

How far along? 36 weeks (and 2 days to be exact...) - I can't believe I'm here!

Total weight gain: 22 pounds... and believe me - while I know most of it is weight for the baby... I am miserable. 

Maternity clothes? Getting dressed has become a challenge. I splurged on one good pair of maternity jeans but the rest has been stuff that I've already owned. And leggings. Lots and lots of leggings. 

Stretch marks? None on my belly (thanks for the good genes, mom!) but I did get one annoying little one on the under-side of my right boob. Random, I know. Guess my bitty-B-cups couldn't take the pressure...

Sleep? Totally unreliable. Most nights I toss and turn and wake up about 7-10 times to pee. And naps just leave me with migraines. But when I do sleep... it's amazing. On a typical night though, I fall asleep anywhere between 11 p.m.-1 a.m. and then am wide awake by 8 a.m. 

Best moment of my pregnancy so far? This is a tie. I had 3 moments which were all pretty awesome. Moment 1 - Hearing Ty's heartbeat for the first time. A friend had loaned us a fetal heartrate doppler and we had been trying to find the baby's heartbeat for a couple of weeks. One morning, I woke up before Brandon and decided to play with it a little while he slept in next to me. It took all of a minute to find it and I knew it was him because it was so fast. I didn't even have to wake Brandon up... the moment he heard it, his eyes shot open and he was so excited to hear it. It was that moment that the entire pregnancy became real to us. Moment 2 - Having Brandon feel Ty kick. I had been feeling him for a few weeks but the movements and kicking were so weak that half the time I wasn't sure what they were and the other half, I could only feel them because, well, he was inside of me. But one day, Brandon had his hand on my belly and Ty kicked. Hard. (Or I thought it was hard at the time... little did I know...) I will never forget as long as I live the look on Brandon's face. He grinned from ear-to-ear and his eyes may have even welled up with tears a little. :) Moment 3 - Telling our parents. I have never been so nervous/excited/scared to tell my parents something in my life. Brandon and I had planned up this elaborate scheme to tell my parents but on Mother's Day, while sitting across from them, I couldn't control myself and I just kind of blurted it out. My mom squealed and my dad couldn't stop giggling. We did a bit more of a "show" for Brandon's parents and were able to capture the moment on camera but I've got to tell you... both of their excitement for our little blessing has been the icing on the cake for this pregnancy. 

Least favorite part of this pregnancy? I must admit... I don't do pregnant well. It's not that I've had this terrible pregnancy because it really has been pretty breezy but I just don't feel like myself. And I hate that. I hate not having any clothes to wear. Or constantly having to keep a bottle of Maalox within reaching distance. And I hate how I constantly feel out of breath and just so... heavy. 

Movement: Ty has been super active. But mostly at night and in the early morning. He's truly part of the problem why I don't fall asleep until so late. Once I get comfy, he's all like - Oh yay! You're still now, mom! Let me show you my tumbling tricks and my kickboxing skills! 

Food cravings? Not really. Most things I crave, I craved before I was pregnant so I can't really blame them on the pregnancy now, can I? But I have wanted lots of apples and fruit. 

Symptoms? The only symptom I've had pretty regularly has been heartburn. And it makes me want to throw myself off a bridge. I never had heartburn before pregnancy and now I feel as though I will never be rid of it. My throat is in a constant burning state. It's super fun. 

Anything making you queasy or sick? Nope. 

Labor signs? Braxton Hicks contractions are becoming more regular. And a bit more uncomfortable than they were a month or even two weeks ago. Yesterday I even had one shoot up my back. Ty has officially "dropped" and as of late last week, I am 3 centimeters dilated. Not to mention I've lost my mucous plug (TMI? Sorry...)! So I think it's safe to say labor is imminent! 

Wedding rings on or off? On. 

Happy or Moody most of the time? Yikes. I'd like to say that my emotions have been pretty stable although I'm sure Brandon would disagree with me there. I have been doing a lot more crying than usual. But I was a cry-baby before I got pregnant. Aside from the first trimester where I was an emotional/miserable disaster, I've been pretty happy and excited!

Looking forward to: All of it. But, really, just meeting him. It's been months and months where I've imagined holding him and feeling him and smelling and kissing him all over. When I think about how close we are I get giddy with excitement and get this insane burst of energy to just do something... anything... that will make his arrival go more smoothly. 

birthday boy.

Today is Brandon's 29th birthday! 

I'm sure everyone says this about the love of their lives but I truly feel, with every breath and every beat of my heart, that I am the luckiest girl in the world to have found someone so amazing, loving, and kind to spend the rest of my life with. I thank God every day for him. Every single day. 

But today is a special day for someone else, too. Today, 29 years ago, Brandon's mom, Ms. Teresa, became a mommy. 

I guess before I got pregnant I always thought of a person's birthday as their day. And in many, many ways it is. Today we are celebrating Brandon turning another year older. Another year of love and laughter and many surprises. I get 365 more days to fall more in love with him. But it's also Ms. Teresa's day... 29 years ago it was her birth-day. The day she had spent 9 months preparing for... sewing his first quilt, hanging (or attempting to hang) wallpaper in his nursery, and learning to love the little boy whom she had not yet met but would become one of her greatest accomplishments. And 29 years ago today, Brandon was born and although Brandon doesn't remember it.... she does. 

And so this is to Ms. Teresa:

I know that the day I will become a mother will be one of my most favorite days. And today is that day for you. I still have yet to experience the kind of love that you have for Brandon and I truly can not wait to finally hold Ty and smell him and hear him. I truly have some wonderful examples of motherhood in my life and I'm so glad that you are one of them. I want you to know that you did such a good job raising Brandon. He is such a good man. Such a loving husband. And he is going to be an amazing, amaaazing father. I hope and pray that Ty will be just like his daddy. And I have you to thank for that. I hope you know how much we love you... how lucky I feel to have such a wonderful mother-in-law... and how lucky Ty will be to have you as his Grandma. So Happy Birth-day! And thanks for this guy: 

35 weeks(ish).

At 35 weeks (and 3 days....):

- Ty is 5.25 pounds and the size of a honeydew melon!
- I'm tired. Not quite the coma-state tired that I was during the first trimester but definitely napping quite a bit more than usual.
- Ty is getting stronger. Much stronger. Like, ohmigod-he's-going-to-punch-threw-my-stomach stronger.
- The nursery decorating has commenced!

- I'm still craving honeycrisp apples. And have also begun craving smoothies, salads, and anything with cheese on it.
- The only exercise I'm getting is in my wrist from all the thank you cards I've been writing. (And I consider it exercise because if you can cramp from it... and I am getting quite a bit of hand cramps... then it's considered exercise in my book).
- I have peed on myself 4 times. True story.
- This "nesting" is getting out. of. control. Brandon begs me to sit on the sofa with him so we can watch one of our favorite shows together but when I do I just anxiously count the minutes until it's over so that I can finish cleaning the baseboards. 
- Ty is getting the hiccups quite often. And it tickles (a.k.a. drives me insane). 
- I have never adored/loved/been so protective of something in my life... especially considering that I have yet to meet this little heartbreaker. 

showered.

People are constantly asking me what my favorite part is about being pregnant and for a while, I was unsure how to answer them. There are so many aspects of it that I love... but how do you put those into short 3-4 word answers. 

It wasn't until this past month, with Thanksgiving and Christmas and (dare I say it?!) Ty's arrival just around the corner that I realized my favorite part of being pregnant. 

The love. 

It seems as if every person in my life has come forward with so much love and advice and gifts and well-wishes that I am constantly overwhelmed with emotion and gratitude. Some days, Brandon will walk into a room where I will be just sobbing and he'll immediately run to my side all panicked and worried and ask what's wrong, and in between sobs I'll choke out how I just am constantly feeling so. very. blessed. 

I feel as if I have prayed more in the past 8 months then I have in most of my life... asking God for guidance, patience, and wisdom to bring this new life into the world but also thanking Him. Thanking Him for every single person that he has placed in my life because each one is playing such a vital role in mentally preparing me for what will become one of the most challenging, yet rewarding experiences of my life... whether they realize it or not. 

And as if the text messages, the phone calls, the lunch dates, and the sweet letters aren't enough to make me feel loved.... my friends and family are also throwing Ty and I showers and buying us baby gifts. It's enough to turn me into an emotional/sobbing/never-be-able-to-thank-them-enough mess. 

Last Sunday, two of my besties, Michelle and Sophie, threw Ty and me a "Cute as a Button" themed brunch shower. I've never been to a shower so lovely, much less had the pleasure of being the guest-of-honor for one!

Along with some delicious breakfast hors d'oeuvres, one of the best white cakes I've ever tasted, and some "citrus brunch punch" that I almost single-handedly finished off... there was also a onesie-making station! Probably one of the most fun things I've ever done! 

And as if all of that wasn't enough... this past Thanksgiving Day, Brandon's family threw me a spur-of-the-moment Thanksgiving Day themed shower! 

(Please excuse the poor quality of these photos... since I had no idea the shower was taking place, I, unfortunately, was unable to properly document how wonderful and lovely it truly was.)

With carrot cake, apple cider, and a "Katie's Pregnancy" trivia game (that even I didn't know half the answers to) it ended up being a surprise memory that I will cherish and never forget. 

My only wish is that Ty knew and understood how lucky he is. He is being born into a world where most of the people who he will come to know have loved him unconditionally since he was just a lemon-drop in my belly. He (along with Brandon and I) is very lucky, indeed. 

love it & really?

First and foremost, Lola and Ty are going to play "Who Wore It Better?" because she just looves wearing his baby clothes. 

Actually I'm lying. She hates it. And me, for making her do it. But she's such a good sport. 

Love it.

- Ty is officially getting getting BIG. My little man is weighing just under 4 pounds and gaining about AN OUNCE a day!
- Having Brandon away for work during the past 2 weeks but still getting to see him yesterday and the day before because he was staying in hotels only a short drive away. Yay for cuddles!
- The little road-trip my mom and I are going to take this weekend to Houston so that we can pick up some of Ty's first furniture! And let the nursery decorating OFFICIALLY begin!!!
- Having the energy and patience to do Wal-Mart during rush hour. It's a pregnancy miracle!
- Brandon telling me that he just loves our family so much. Our family. Whoa. We've officially started one of those.
- Passing my glucose test with flying colors! And according to my mid-wife, my blood pressure and iron levels are "textbook perfect"! Yipeee!
- And because no "love it" post would be complete without the mention of food - the vegetable lo mein I just inhaled was pretty flippin' amaaaazing. 

Really?

- The fantasy I have of bed-pans. Kinda mortifying that I actually fantasize about being able to pee without leaving the comfort of my bed but I totally do. 
- Eating an entire pecan pie by myself in a 3-day time period. Oh, the gluttony. 
- My butt is literally getting flat and wide. Is granny-ass a pregnancy side effect? Because it should be. 
- Pregger brain running dry. Brandon, at this stage, probably thinks he married an idiot. 
- Hypnobirthing. I took a class and I sucked. My mind just does not have the capability to completely calm itself into nothingness and total relaxation. Instead, I was that girl that couldn't stop giggling. And when I tried to stop, it just made matters worse and I giggled harder and louder. What am I? A thirteen year old? 
- Looking at myself naked in the bathroom mirror (what? you do it. just because you don't announce it to everyone....) and realizing that my belly is becoming the shelf to house my ta-tas. Part of me is like, Yay! My boobies are getting big! and the other part of me is like, Dude. Look at your stomach. Look. At. It. You're a whale.
- And while we're on the subject of being totally inappropriate... pregnancy causes constipation, ya know? So when the deed is done, I feel the need to let Brandon know. And he responds with a "Good job, hun!" and we really are both so excited. It's totally weird but I kinda love it. Now I'm just debating whether I should buy a potty chart to hang on the fridge to put gold stars on. 

at 31 weeks.

At 31 weeks:
- I'm literally dying to meet him. And secretly hoping he comes a teensy bit early. 
- I'm craving pecan pie. And honeycrisp apples. And anything that horseradish can be added to. 
- Ty is being a good little boy and keeping his head down. I have the sore ribs to prove it. 
- I feel fat. My clothes are literally stretched to the max. And I swear I won't let people take pictures of my face for fear of my double-chin. 
- All pillow talk is consumed with talk of our new little family and all the things we plan on doing with our little man. Baths, feedings, reading to him... and letting him be naked. Because nothing's cuter than a little butt with baby cellulite. 
- I feel like I can't breathe. Constantly. Thank you, uterus, for squishing my lungs to the point of suffocation. 
- When sleeping happens, it's the most amazing sleep ever. But most of the time I just lay there. Which is totally okay because that's usually the time Ty is the most active. So I just put my hand on my belly and rub him. I'm totally in love. 
- My balance is whack. I'm tripping and bumping into EVERYTHING. I'm actually currently nursing a busted pinky toe right now. 
- We haven't purchased a single thing for Ty's nursery yet. This probably means something... 
- I cry. All the time. Over everything. I can be happy... sad... or in the case of yesterday, have no emotion at all and just start crying. Gotta love preg hormones. 

In 6 weeks we'll be full term! Can you believe it?? Oh, baby boy, we can not wait to meet you!

mommy healing powers.

Yesterday was so perfect. It was a beautiful day, Brandon got to come home for lunch, I got a lot of cleaning done, and we got to see our beautiful son's face for the first time!

Say hello to Mr. Tyson Lee Sillivan!

Of course, our little stud was super stubborn and refused to put his arms down or turn to a position where we could get a good look at him so this was the best picture we got. I get Round 2 with my little man and his perfect profile on Monday morning. 

That night, Brandon and I ate dinner, watched a little tv, and were in bed at about 10 p.m. We fell asleep talking about Ty and his cuteness and our dreams for him (which is pretty much how we always fall asleep these days). 

But then, at about 3 a.m. I woke up from being so uncomfortable and hot. I got up, checked the thermostat (which was on 65) and just as I was about to get back into bed, the nauseousness hit. Mind you, I haven't felt nauseous since my first trimester... and only once during that entire period did it wake me up from my slumber. I instantly ran to the guest bathroom because I knew that Brandon had an important day the next morning and needed a good night's sleep. And the sickness came on. I stared into that toilet bowl for what felt like an eternity... only leaving it to get a glass of water and a pillow. Just when I thought I was beginning to feel a bit better, I'd lay on the cold tile in my misery and then a second, third, and fourth wave of nauseousness would hit.

At about 4:30 a.m. I felt defeated and was pushed to my brink. The tears came and I sat there on the bathroom floor sobbing and dry heaving and feeling not much aside from self-pity. And at that moment I wished for my mom. 

I know, even then I felt a little silly. My husband was asleep in a room less than 15 feet away from me and he would have gladly held my hair back and calmed me down if I would have just woken him up. And it's not like me being sick away from home was something new... I haven't lived at home in almost 7 years. But I couldn't help it... in that particular moment, there wasn't much I wanted more. I may have even called her if my phone hadn't been in the bedroom and I wouldn't have been terrified of projectile vomiting everywhere the moment I stood up. So instead, I did the next best thing and cried myself to sleep on the bathroom floor. 

This morning, when Brandon woke up and I told him about my terrible night (after getting mad at me for not waking him), he admitted that he, too, sometimes wished for his mom when he wasn't feeling well. He confessed that just last week when he had a sinus infection and strep throat at the same time, he had wished his mom lived closer so that she could care for him (I had done my best to nurse him back to health but the man was milking his illness a little much in my opinion...) and it made me wonder, what is it about a mom that can instantly comfort us? 

Will I get this mommy healing power once Ty is born? Will he come running to me to kiss his boo-boos and dry his tears? I've seen myself as a lot of things but maternal has never really been one of them. In fact, when our dogs start acting ill, I just get hysterical. Brandon's usually the level-headed one who knows all the tricks in the book to get their little tails wagging again. Will it just come to me like everyone keeps saying it will? Like the moment Ty is born, this secret chamber in my brain that houses all the remedies in the world will just open up and I'll be all like "Eureka! The child is crying! Bring him an antacid and lay him on his belly!" That'd be awesome... but I'm thinking it probably won't happen. (Actually... an antacid and being laid on his belly would probably be the worst thing you could do... come to think of it.)

Fact of the matter is... I know nothing about babies. Or what to do when they're crying. But I do know that my mom does. So thank God she's only a phone call away because I certainly won't be afraid to call her at 4 a.m. when it comes to my little man. And maybe I'll pick up a few tricks of the trade and learn a little somethin-somethin too. 

nesting.

I have been waiting for this. Praying for it, really. Truly hoping that I would be one of those women who got to experience the so-called phase of pregnancy termed "nesting". 

I tend to not be a neat-freak (understatement of the year)... and my house can get a little out of control from time to time... so when I heard that many women experience a time in their pregnancy where they feel this uncontrollable urge to clean and organize and scrub baseboards, I was like, "YES. I want that."

But I didn't know when to expect it. 

My first trimester was hard. Like why-do-women-even-want-babies-after-all-this-misery hard. And it didn't help that I hadn't fully accepted that there was this little being growing inside of me. I was nauseous, tired, and just really wanted a glass of wine with my dinner. When I wasn't throwing up, I was cramping, and when I wasn't cramping, I was sleeping. I think I remember telling Brandon (with complete seriousness) that if he wanted more babies he was going to have to get someone else pregnant. (Now, of course, I completely take that back.) Everyone kept telling me that the second trimester would be better and I remember thinking that it better be or I was going to stab everyone in the face. But cleaning? Cleaning was the LAST thing on my mind. 

It's weird because almost the day that I hit the second trimester, I felt better. Like myself again. Like, "Oh, hi, Katie... welcome back! Now if you could just send that demon-person that had taken your place in your absence to the hell where they came from, that would be great." I had more energy. My appetite returned to normal. And the nauseousness that had controlled my life for 3 months vanished into thin air. I got to finish enjoying the summer and find out we were having a little boy and feel him kick and turn and I fell in love. But, no... no cleaning. 

And then last week I hit my third trimester. And I expected to feel different the day it I hit the mark just like I had for my second trimester. But alas... nada. I think I actually took a 4 hour nap and when I woke up I had a migraine and I remember thinking, "Ohmigod. I've taken a step back! I'm slipping back into pregnancy-hell!" But as the week flew by, I realized that not much had changed. 

Or so I had thought. 

Apparently, this past weekend I had hit the "nesting" faze of my pregnancy and hadn't even realized it. Here, in my little 'ole head, I was thinking I was just "picking up". I went through all of Brandon and I's dressers and closets to find clothes that we could donate to Goodwill. I organized our "junk basket" in the living room. I did more loads of laundry then I think I've ever done in my life. I swept, and mopped, and dusted and cleaned parts of my house that I hadn't touched since we first moved in. But it wasn't until Brandon walked into the kitchen with me on my hands and knees scrubbing the cabinets and and the floors with a sponge and stood over me asking what exactly I was doing when I responded, "Well, cleaning the floors, of course. All of this area is going to be the parts of the house that our little man is going to be able to reach so I'm just making sure it's properly cleaned." As soon as I said it, I dropped the sponge, looked up at Brandon and smiled from ear-to-ear.. "Ohmigod. Am I nesting?" He raised his eyebrows and responded, "Well considering the entire house smells like Clorox and PineSol, I'm going to go with a 'yes' on that one." 

Hallelujah! And the crazy thing is, I don't even hate it. Normally I despise cleaning. Truly. But last night, Brandon had to literally pry the broom out of my hands so that we could watch The Walking Dead together... and all I could think of during the entire show was my mental list of cleaning projects I could tackle tomorrow. 

Which is now today. So please excuse me while I go clean. I need to take full advantage of this in case it's a fluke. 

who said shopping for baby girls was more fun?

When I first found out I was pregnant with a boy I was ecstatic (obviously) but then then I was like... "Oh no, what if he doesn't like to shop?". And when I first went shopping for my little bubs, I was blown away with the girl-to-boy ratio of baby clothing. Imagine racks and racks of little girl dresses and outfits and waaay back in the far corner, one itty bitty wall of baby boy apparel. Womp womp. 

But not to fear... there is a lot of adorable stuff for baby boys. You just have to search for it. Which kinda makes it more fun. 

1. George Alphabet Wall Art

2. Favorite Colorblock One-piece

3. Mamas & Papas Juice High Chair

4. Infantino Breathe Carrier

5. Favorite Velour Footed One-piece

6. Skip Hop Tree Friends Activity Gym

7. Favorite Fleece Jacket

8. Disney Bodysuit with Grow-an-Inch Snaps

delivering a baby.

I gotta say... one of the things that drives me the most crazy about being pregnant is when people ask me the simple question, "So who is you doctor?"

I know, I know. The question is simple enough but I've got to tell you, my response always brings raised eyebrows and a bit of judgment.

Example...

Random Woman: "So who is your doctor?"

Me: "Well, I am choosing not to use a doctor and am using a midwife instead."

Random Woman: "A midwife?"

Me: "Well, yes. I would like to deliver naturally without an epidural and a midwife was the best fit for me."

Random Woman: "Wait. You want to have the baby without an epidural?! Good luck with that."

Of course, the conversation can vary a bit but for the most part, it always has the same outcome. And bottom line... it really drives me nuts.

Before I go off on this tangent, let me start by saying that I am not delivering naturally to show how tough I am or be able to put myself on a pedestal above other mothers' who delivered differently. It was a decision I thought long and hard about, weighing the pros and cons, and figuring out which way I knew I would want my birthing experience to be. Please, please keep this in mind.

But I've got to say.... I really think a lot of people have a misconception about midwives. You imagine them to be all granola and hippy and "let mother earth heal your pain, my child" but the reality is, they're not. Not to worry... Brandon had this misconception as well. When I first told him that I'd like to interview a midwife for the delivery, he freaked out telling me that he just didn't want to have the baby in our living room while our family sat around chanting spiritual encouragements.

Umm... what??

Truth of the matter is, though, that my midwife is very professional, very educated, and I'm certain that if you met her in the hospital setting that I meet her in regularly, you'd never assume that she was a midwife. You'd most likely assume that she was an OBGYN. Except you would notice that she took more time with you. And was more on your level. And was very encouraging for even the most frightened mothers-to-be (like myself). And yes, I will be delivering in a hospital.

I feel comfortable and confident around her. She makes me feel at ease with the changes that are going on with my body. She's been in my shoes. And she's funny. Like thank-God-I'm-not-the-only-one-who-thinks-half-of-these-pregnancy-rules-are-crock funny. But most of all, I like her. And I know that she truly wants me to succeed in my chosen method of delivery. So why wouldn't I want her to be the one to deliver my baby? After meeting her, even Brandon can't help but say that he's glad we chose to go this route.

And as far as the epidural is concerned, it's a decision I made the moment I found out I was pregnant. Pregnancy is a beautiful thing. Truly. And I feel so unbelievably blessed that I get to experience it. I know that there are millions of women out there who have a hard time conceiving and it almost doesn't seem fair that Brandon and I got pregnant without even trying. So I don't want to take a moment of any of this for granted. And I just don't believe that giving birth is something to be numbed... like a headache. Or a broken leg. It's a miracle and it's meant to be experienced. Yes, I know it'll be painful. I am fully aware that it just may be one of the most excruciating things I'll ever do. But I hope that through every labor pain I can remember that delivering a baby is a gift from God. And I want to be able to literally feel that gift in every limb of my body, painful or not, because I know that the end result will be worth it.

Now... this is the way I choose to give birth. I am by no means saying this is the "right way" because frankly, there is no "right way". Choosing your method of delivery is like buying a camera. If you and I were to go into Best Buy right now to buy a camera, chances are we'd choose different cameras because we were both looking for a camera that best suited us and the way that we intended to use it. Every woman is different, so why do we seem so surprised and discouraging when a woman chooses a different method of delivery than the one we intended to use?

Food for thought.

Rant over.

love it & really?

Sorry for the lack of posts! Broken laptops can do that... that and my complete lack of motivation to do basically anything but spend time with Brandon... 

Love it.

- Baby clothes. I mean, could there be anything cuter? Imagine perfect little outfits that your husband would wear except 10 times smaller. And you better believe my son is going to be dressed like a little Brandon-mini-me.
- I think it's finally starting to hit Brandon that we're going to have a baby in less than 3 months (and, no, it hasn't quite hit me yet). There's nothing that makes my eyes swell with tears more then having him rub my belly and talk to our little boy. He tells our son all the things he plans on teaching him and showing him and how excited he is to meet him. Fatherhood is going to look good on that man.
- Baby consignment shops. Could there be anything greater? A seersucker romper for $3? Yes please. Sweet little onesies that still have the tags on them for 50 cents? Don't mind if I do. It's like crack for mommies.
- My subtle cravings for carrot cake and strawberry Pop Tarts. I don't hate it. My thighs do... but I don't.
- People are finally starting to notice that I have a belly from being pregnant and not from being a complete fatty! (Insert angel's chorus here.)
- Surprise dates with my husband. I gotta tell you... not much can make me giddier than having Brandon call me on his way home from work and tell me to get dressed because he's taking me out for a night on the town. Holding hands across the table, sharing dessert, and laughing until it literally hurts makes me fall for him even more (and I didn't even know that was possible). 


Really?

- Maternity clothes. You're given two choices: ugly as sin or expensive as sin. I had finally found a maternity line that I loved except there was ZERO justification to spend $220 on a top that I'd only wear for two months. Looks like I'll be sticking to my trusty leggings and oversized sweatshirts. Sexyy.
- Acid reflux. There's nothing I love more then vomiting in my mouth and being forced to swallow it for hours at a time. Get Tums, they said... it'll help, they said. They're all liars. Kill. Me. Now.
- People who judge me for choosing to go with a midwife for my unsedated delivery. I can't even tell you how many stare at me wide-eyed and tell me I'm crazy when I tell them I don't want an epidural or to deliver with an OBGYN. (This is a rant for another post on another day...).
- Aaand my insomnia has gotten worse. God, I hope this is just prep for the baby and not for the rest of my life. It'd be nice to sleep for periods of longer than 2 hours at a time.
- Holy nipples. 'Nuff said. 
- And umm... where has my belly button gone? If you find it, please send it home. 
- About this "nesting" faze... I'd like to get in on that. Motivation to clean something would be killer right about now. 
- Getting the email from my midwife congratulating me on entering my third trimester. And to inform me that in the next 3 months I should be expected to gain 11 pounds. That's like me adding TWO Lola's to my midsection. No ma'am.... ain't nobody got time for that. 
- And don't ask how... but Brandon and I definitely watched a video of Ricky Lake giving birth. My eyes are still burning. 

this weekend.

This weekend was perfect and glorious. B was off work for the entire weekend and so we got to spend the weekend being lazy and relaxed.

Saturday we woke up, went to our favorite local deli for lunch, and then hit up some of our favorite  vintage shops here in Baton Rouge. I'm looking for some fun, boyish furniture for Baby S that won't fall apart within a year or two. But after hitting up a few shops with no luck, we decided to head to Denham Springs to check out the Antique District.

I've had a few unique ideas for decor for Baby S's nursery but I didn't want to spend an arm and a leg to make these ideas become a reality. Obviously, we're parents on a budget. BUT, lo and behold, three ideas that I had will become a reality!

Idea 1:

I really, really, really want Baby S to have a library. Like a legit book collection. I want to read to him all the time. I love to read and I really loved to read as a child and I want Baby S to enjoy it as much as I do. But bookshelves are either really expensive, really cheap, or ugly. So I've been trying to find a fun way, unique way to store his books. And I found one:

Brandon and I found a few old wood crate boxes that will be mounted on his walls for book storage. I love the rustic feel and for less than $10, it's very affordable for us.

Idea 2:

Since the boxes were so cheap, I may have gotten a little over-excited and purchased a few too many. But obviously, I don't want 8 boxes hanging on his wall. That would be just too much. So Brandon will be Mr. Handyman again and turning some of them into toy storage. I'm going to have to sand them down a lot to make sure Baby doesn't get splinters when trying to grab to his toys but I think it is so cute.

Again, super cheap. The only thing we're going to have to buy are the wheels.

Idea 3: 

Baby S is going to have a lot of blankets. Most baby's do. And I don't want to hide them away in a closet. So we found the sweetest vintage ladder for baby blanket storage...

Again, super cheap, rustic, and efficient. 

What I love most about all of these ideas is that we spent maybe around $35 for all these items, so if they don't look right or don't work the way we imagine, it's not like we're going to be out a ton of cash. But I think they'll add a unique, boyish charm to Baby S's nursery! Bring on the sandpaper, baby!

birth plan.

Today I had the fun of going to the doctor to check on baby. Again. I'm not sure why I find it annoying to have so many doctor's appointments. I understand that the health and well-being of Baby S is of the upmost importance but I think going to the doctor 1-2 times a month is a bit of overkill. But nevertheless, they said you're supposed to do it and so I do it. 

After my appointment today, I met with a nurse to discuss making a "birth plan". My midwife recommends doing this for all of her patients but especially those who wish to have a natural birth (like myself). I think she realized she was going to have to walk me through the process when she asked if I had come up with one yet. The convo went a little like this:

Midwife: "So, Katie, have you begun working on your birth plan?"
Me: "Birth plan?" (and a face of bewilderment.)
Midwife: "Yes. Your plan for when you have the baby."
Me: "Well sure... my 'plan' is to give birth..." (said like, "umm.. duh.")

Apparently though... giving birth is on every woman's "birth plan". And here I was thinking I was the only one who had it all figured out. 

After meeting with the nurse, though, I got to tell ya... some women are nuts. 

Here are some of the examples of what some women put in their birth plans and my reaction to them. 

- No one allowed in room except for husband, nurse, and doctor. Ever. Now this I might understand for when you actually begin to push... or if you're super modest (which I am not)... But to exclude your entire family and friends who come to be there for you on one of the happiest days of your life by shutting them out into the waiting room... sounds kind of selfish to me. Personally, I'm one of those, "the more the merrier" people and I'm always one to appreciate additional support. 

- Please do not bathe the baby once it is delivered. What the hell? Now that's just gross. I fully anticipate being so overwhelmed with love once our son is delivered that I may just want to be like a lioness and lick my little cub clean... but that doesn't mean I will. If I did, Brandon would likely barf on me. 

- Do not remove umbilical cord until it has stopped pulsating. Okay... so when I heard of this, I thought that maybe I had missed out on some hidden medical miracle and that I should consider doing this too... until I read that there are no scientifically backed benefits of doing this and that the umbilical cord could pulsate for up to half an hour after the baby is born. "Come on in guys! Come see our baby! And don't mind the umbilical cord and placenta still attached to his belly button..." Again... gross. 

- Please keep voices to a whisper while in delivery room. In a perfect universe, I would like this, too. But I'm loud. And Brandon's loud. And I don't think either side of our extended family knows how to "whisper". So instead of thinking this is a good idea, I instead find it hysterical. And a little O.C.D. 

- Please do not allow anyone to touch the baby except the mother and father. I mean... get a hold of yourself.... 

I apologize if any of these things were on/are on your birth plan. This is obviously all of my personal opinion. 

My birth plan is going to look something a little like this:

1. No epidural. Unless I ask for one. Even then, try to encourage me to not have one. Really... don't give me one unless I start to get violent. In that case... shoot me up. 
2. Give birth. This should be a given... but ya never know. 
3. Have cheese enchiladas ready for after the baby's born because momma is gonna be hungry and cheese enchiladas can heal even the sorest of you-know-whats. 

The End. 

bumpity bump bump.

Here I am in all my gloriousness, at 24 weeks & 1 day preggers, pretending like it's not 82 degrees outside and wearing a sweater and leggings. Take that Louisiana weather! It's September, yo. Get the memo!

But don't hate the leggings... because they're all I feel comfy in these days. Buttoning my jeans have become quite the dreaded experience. In fact, I think I might die if my legs have to touch another pair of jeans. We've totally embraced pantlessness in this house. If only we could convert the rest of the world. 

love it & really??

Love it. 

- He's kicking! He's kicking! It's really one of the best feelings in the world to know he's in there and being so active. Every time I feel him begin to move, I hurry up and put my hand on my belly because I don't want to miss a single movement. 
- Cravings... and the fact that for the past few weeks I've had none. It makes it so much easier to eat a well balanced diet. Hello Caesar salads... goodbye Whopper jr's. 
- Aaaand Winn Dixie has started carrying my most favorite-ist coffee creamer in the entire world, Peppermint Mocha! So I hauled my butt all the way over to Coursey to get THREE bottles of it and some of the best decaffeinated coffee that money could buy! Every sip is like a sip of heaven... I've got to tell ya. 
- How proud I am of myself for cooking every. single. night. Yep... total housewife package right here. 
- The way Brandon lights up and kisses me and tells me I'm the best wife ever when dinner hits the spot. (This should tell you how often this really happens...)
- Waking up to rain, a crisp 67 degrees, a dim room, and a hubby who wanted to skip breakfast to cuddle (he never does that!). Oh the coziness...
- Brandon talking to my belly and reassuring Baby S that the spasticness that is his momma is something that he'll grow to love, just like he did. Tear. 
- Embarrassing my brothers' with fun little tidbits of information about my pregnancy. See below. 

I know they love it. 
- And we have a baby name!!!!


Really??

- Going to grab lunch with two girlfriends who I haven't seen in forever and have them sit there and talk about all the work-outs, dieting, etc. that they've been doing and they still feel "fat". While I'm sitting there licking the potatoes off my plate and wishing they offered free seconds. 
- Having Baby S kick my bladder. Aaand I've officially peed on myself. Curse you kegal exercises that I haven't been doing... curse you. 
- My cooking. I said I've been doing it every night... I didn't say it's been turning out good. I cried over a roast that ended up more like beef jerky and some sliders that ended up having their bottoms' blackened. Thank God Brandon's such a team player and pretends like he likes his food that way. "Oh you mean I can't pierce this roast with a fork? That's just how I like it, baby." and "Blackened is how I like all my buns. It adds a sort of smoky, charcoal-y taste that really brings out the flavor." 
- Baby registries. I haven't started officially putting one together but I have been looking. And I have no idea what I'm looking at. As I'm scrolling through example registries online, most of my reactions are like "What the heck is that? Wait... that goes where?!!". Holy awkwardness, I don't care how necessary it is, I do not want to unwrap that sucker at a party... 
- Urine samples at the doctor's office. I hate them. I hate them. I hate them. And I always manage to pee on my hand. And then I spend an additional 20 minutes in the bathroom literally scrubbing my flesh off because it's just so dang gross. 
- Speaking of peeing... Brandon walking in on me during another pee sesh. He says, "All I ever do is see you on the toilet peeing these days or crying". He thinks I'm sexy. 

a quilt.

This past Tuesday, I had the most awesome day with my mom. I've been lucky to have my mom (and Brandon's mom, for that matter) be so involved in this little baby's life... and to think, he hasn't even graced us with his presence yet! 

My mom is planning on making the bedding for our little boy since I'm really not into a lot (or any) of the baby bedding out there that they have for little boys. Basically, we have two choices... farm animals or sports paraphernalia. And no thanks to both. 

And so on Tuesday, mom and I went on the hunt for some fabric that she could begin the quilt with. After a few unsuccessful trips to Hancock Fabrics and a quilting shop that had closed, we found the cutest little shop that had some of the most modern and stylish fabric. And we found lots of fabric we loved!

I couldn't be more excited for the finished product. 

We also found the paint colors' for the nursery, which turned out to be easier than I thought since mom was wearing the exact color navy on her dress (because, yes, I am being very particular about the navy that will be in this room...). 

I feel like it's becoming more "real" now. Like, this little being growing and kicking inside of my belly will eventually come out. And then some moments I feel like I may just be pregnant forever and never be able to enjoy a cup of coffee or a glass of wine again. 

BUT, as soon as the weather cools just a bit more (hopefully in the next week or two), I'm going to enlist the help of my brothers' and get the spare furniture out of the what will become the nursery. And then we (my mom, Brandon, and I) will begin the fun process of creating a room for a little boy that will be here in 16 short weeks! 

16 weeks. Sounds so soon. Like, I'm going to blink and then have a baby in my arms. I need to really try and remember to stop and take this all in because I feel like it's just going by so, very fast. 

Everything changes.

I've had the same car since my sophomore year of college. After wrecking my Mitsubishi Gallant, my dad gave me his car, a 2001 Toyota Camry. That was almost 6 years ago. But even before that, my family had the ole' Camry... as far back as my high school days. It's weird now when I'm driving in it to look in the rearview mirror and think that not too long ago, I was sitting in that very backseat with my two brothers while we drove with my parents to church. And then to imagine that in 4 months, I'll have my own baby back there. It's quite a crazy feeling.

I've driven to parties in that car, road-tripped in that car, got a few first kisses in that car, and laughed and cried and even been broken up with in that car. I practically lived out of that car when Brandon and I first started dating... always keeping a spare toothbrush and some bobby pins in the center console. I even remember recently using that car to stop by Walgreens to buy a pregnancy test, being scared out of my mind, and praying to God the whole way home that the outcome would be what He thought was best. And now... well, now I'm shopping for a baby seat for that car.

I can't help but think of how much my life has changed since my parents first drove the Camry off the lot. How much I've grown and learned and lived. How many things that I dreamed about then that didn't come true and, yet, here I am so blessed and so happy that I wouldn't altar a single moment of any of it.

Everything changes... but some things... even if it is just the old Toyota you drive, some things stay the same.

Letters to Baby S. - Entry #2

September 3, 2012

Hello Love, 

You're 22 weeks old today and weighing right at 1 pound. It's truly crazy how quickly the time has flown by. I feel as if it was only yesterday that I sat with your daddy on our bed in disbelief as we both stared at the outcome of the pregnancy test. But I know that time has passed because all the inhibitions and fear that I had then has completely melted away and now I have nothing but feelings of excitement and impatientness for your arrival. 

Two weekends ago we found out your were a boy! Our son. And it I couldn't be more smitten. I've spent many hours laying awake at night imagining the kind of boy you'll be. And I know, that if you're anything like you're father, you'll be handsome, smart, funny, and loving. And if you're anything like me, you'll be stubborn,  clumsy, and talkative. Let's hope you receive a pinch more of your father's genes... 

Three nights ago I felt you kick for the first time. Well, it was the first time I knew it was kick. In retrospect, I may have been feeling you move for quite some time, but your movements weren't quite as strong yet and I wasn't sure what exactly the fluttering in my tummy was. Now that I know that it's you, I realize that you're quite the active little boy. Your movements have gotten so strong that your dad was even able to feel one of your kicks... when it happened he jumped back in awe and smiled from ear to ear. It was a moment I'll never forget. 

It's truly mind-blowing to me how much of my day is consumed with thoughts of you. And how much I already love you. Sometimes (and I like to blame this on the pregnancy hormones), when I think about you all snug and growing inside of me, it makes my eyes well up with tears and this huge wave of emotion completely overwhelms me. If your dad is around, he'll usually laugh at my expense and I don't blame him... you've turned me into a marshmallow. 

Just 18 more weeks... we're more than halfway there. 

I love you, son. 

Love, Mommy

What Will It Bee??

Last weekend, both Brandon's and my family threw us our first baby shower. A "What Will It Bee?" shower since no one (with the exception of my bestie, Michelle) knew what gender Baby S was.

Our ultrasound nurse told us when to close our eyes, determined whether Baby S was XX or XY, and hid the answer in a sealed envelope.

Brandon and I quickly drove the envelope to my best friend, Michelle, who held onto it for safe keeping until the party.

And without further ado, here are pictures from our "What Will It Bee?" shower!

And wouldn't you know it... 

It's weird... after finding out for sure what sex Baby S is, Brandon and I admitted to each other that we both truly thought he was a boy from the beginning. I'm, literally, the most excited I've ever been in my entire life! 

The shower sure did make Brandon and I realize how blessed we truly are. We have some pretty amazing family and friends and I can't wait for our son (it's so fun saying that!) to meet them all. He's going to one spoiled rotten little man.